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So, this is my Blog, my thoughts / feelings / ideas. You may comment if you like. If you attack me, I come back at you with reckless / racist / suicidal abandon. If you compliment me, I thank you. If you don't ever visit again I don't care. Other than that, just enjoy what I write, or not.
Salagatle!


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Monday, February 20, 2012

Early morning meetings, traffic, metro cops, hawkers, bad drivers....MONDAY!

It must be Monday.
On the basis that I have to be in the office for a meeting every morning at 7.55, I decided to get up earlier, and get to the office early, so that if there are any traffic issues, I wouldn't be late. I plan to keep my side clean for now, no need to rock the boat any more than it can manage.
As it was, Friday was a good start. We (sales) were here, in the office, for the 16h30 meeting, but our manager only got here at 16H50, and the meeting only ended at 17h 40!
And the traffic just imploded. A multi-car pile up on the highway, just past the 14th Ave. on/off ramps, traveling North, and there was chaos all around. I eventually got to the office at 7h55!
 Typically, any cars wanting to join the queue from side roads, would fill the intersections, so that when it was green for us to go, we couldn't move anyway. Then the usual black savage coming down a right turn only lane, and then squeezing in through red lights was really getting to me. There is no respect for law, and no wonder we have the highest road death rate in the world. Just wish more of the retards would die and less of the law aiding citizens.
I pull one over, and threaten to beat him to a pulp with my baton. The dumb Fuck didn't even know what he had done wrong?!?! He did, however, understand what Kaffir means, and that a baton can / will inflict serious harm and damage, as he took himself off to the nearest turn off, and fled. Moron.

So, I get to the office in time for the meeting anyway, and guess what! The manager is not in. He calls in from his car / home / local bar / wherever. Salesmen 2 - 0 Management.
After the call I scream off to Sandton to collect a tender response document which needs to be delivered to Pretoria. No idea what the roads will be like. Takes me just under an hour to drive about 10 km!! Collect the docs, and hit the highway.

This is the 5 lane highway from Pretoria to Johannesburg. I measured it over 12 km! Lets assume 1 car per 5m, across 5 lanes, over 12 km = that's about 12000 cars, standing and idling..... Worlds biggest parking lot! Luckily I had a relatively clear run to Pretoria, and found the clients offices quite quickly. No parking, so Im pulled into a loading zone, which was closely watched by 3 of our friendly Metro Police / Parking meter attendants, and asked if I could stop there for 40 seconds whilst I dropped off the tender. "No problem sir!". Great. Park, grab tender docs, run around the front of the building, fond the tender box, deposit, walk back to the car, and thank them, and leave. Best car watch team in Gauteng I think!

And on the way back I thought about taking an alternative route back to the office, then figured "Hey, I'm on the clock, company time, let's do the traffic!". As it was, whatever had caused the backup was cleared, and the traffic was mostly gone, so I have an uneventful / uninterrupted drive back to Sandton. Then I go to the dreaded Graystone off-ramp.

As usual, the horrid scum bags hawkers were there. Easy enough to ignore them. But they are closely followed by the monkeys with the bottles of soapy water, and squeegees, who want to wash your windscreens. And if you wave them away, they get aggressive.  The clown I waved away threatened to scratch  my car, so out came the trusty baton, and I got out, and he beat a hasty retreat. Swear I am quite willing to kill the bastard! Drive across the bridge over the highway, and there is a Metro car, parked next to the road, 2 of the pigs having a notice chat with a taxi driver, no doubt collecting for the widows and orphans fund! I pull over, get out and chirp "You might want to go over there and do your duty, get rid of the illegal hawkers. One of them is liable to get killed soon. DO some work, don't stand around here hoping to make a few bucks off a cellphone user / seat-belt offense!" Eyes light up, they think about getting clever, and notice me take out my cellphone, and said, "Yes sir, we will go sort it out!".

Back at the head office, I take my laptop in to have one of the applications rerolled, so that gives me 2-3 hours to hang around.
Now I'm back at out offices, and waiting for the 16h30 meeting. Wonder if fucknuts will show up?

Overall, a bad start to the week. A typical Monday start I suppose, at it's worst.
Ah well, you have to live it understand!

Salagatle!

10 comments:

Unknown said...

Hey from the States! I came across your blog by accident, but have been reading incessantly for about an hour, now. This is the kind of perspective I've been looking for. After med school, I want to get the hell out of America. It's just as corrupt as the next country, but far less enjoyable in terms of weather. Regarding the monkeys, I can't help but find myself entertained. I look forward to reading more of these in the future.

Kudos
Tyler

Bruthafromanothamutha said...

I shouldn't laugh but I thought my day was shit until I read this - be careful my friend

Wreckless Euroafrican said...

laugh all you want - I was pissing my pants when I eventually wrote this....
Salagatle!

Wreckless Euroafrican said...

@ Unknown - Welcome. I'm surprised to say you want out of the USA - but then maybe I shouldn't be. Where would you consider going though? Don't tell me Africa - having said that, there are some countries that might pass as acceptable, but corruption is rife across the continent. Ans as for the nanny states out there..... maybe some small, insignificant island off the South American coast?
monkeys?

Salagatle!

Unknown said...

I won't lie; I've given ample consideration to living in Suid-Afrika. Some intimidating things have come to pass in America, recently. You may (or may not) have heard about NDAA 2012. It gives the military the authority to detain suspected "terrorists," even US citizens, without trial or legal representation indefinitely. The Gov't is getting a little too brazen for me. If it gets worse, I'll be an ex-pat before I even get INTO med school. Maybe I'm just a disillusioned Yank, but I'm not interested in wading through the destruction of my country. Regarding South America, not a chance. I'm not a fan of Spanish, let alone Latin American Spanish. There are also NZ and Australia, but every time I think of them, I want to sing "God Save the Queen." SA just seems to fit. I guess I'll find out when I visit this summer, eh?

Cheers from the States!
Tyler

Wreckless Euroafrican said...

Tyler, First time I ever hear of a disillusioned Yank(sic). Mostly they all talk about how everything is bigger / better back home. I agree with your sentiments on Aus and NZ, nanny states, and maybe you have a point about South America, but Africa? Well, I suppose it's how you view your options, and tackle the challenges. I am sure you will be blown away when you come to RSA, but keep in mind that being a tourist here is very different to living here. And, for what it's worth, those of us who think about these things believe that we could be heading for the same fiasco as is currently in place in Zimbabwe. We still have too many poor people here, and a government who is in place only to enrich the few..... But we live in hope.
Let us know how the trip pans out!

Salagatle!

Unknown said...

I forgot to address the "monkey" thing. What's the word... um... Kaffir? And yes, Yank, or Yankee. Now, being from the southern US, "Yankee" is a derogatory term for someone in the North, but I know a few Aussies who refer to me as their "Yank friend." No biggie. Also, I've had a similar discussion with other people here, and they say the same thing: we've got it bigger and better here. I usually glaze over, but if I do manage a response, the ensuing diatribe concludes with having said person asking me when I'm taking my vacation and if they can accompany me.
Anyway, having read some of the recent developments north of you, I have to say that I'm more than a little hesitant to just up and emigrate. But, I, too, live in hope. I wouldn't be expecting the "Rhodie Nightmare" anytime soon.
Finally, I was perplexed by the photo of the pet tortoise. It looked like the bronze statuette my mother's attorney has at her office, so I wasn't sure it was real until I read the description. Always a good read.

Bonsoir des Etats-Unis!

Wreckless Euroafrican said...

@Unknown, OK see what you meant by the monkey statement - let me just point out, in case you don't know, it's no longer politically correct to use that word. Whatever you do, don't ever use it if you visit the African Continent.You will find I use it mostly when I'm seriously pissed off because of a specific event, but I also have an understanding side, not completely racist!! The tortoise was not harmed in any way, and we didn't leave him on the pedestal for too long. Maybe 3 or 4 minutes. (Just in case any bunny huggers were wondering). Thanx for the comments.... chat soon.

Salagatle!

Unknown said...

I'm hardly the kind of person to feel unwarranted hatred for anyone, so I understand that. It happens to the best of us. I was just offering an explanation of my amusement with the "monkey" thing with a term I figured would clarify.
Alas, no bunny hugger in this guy. I'm a game hunter, myself.
Have a good one.

Tyler

Wreckless Euroafrican said...

@Unknown - I figured as much, just want to make sure you don't get into trouble by using the Kaffir word, because you see it here.....
And based on my knowledge of the general American pubic, didn't figure you for a bunny hugger. they mostly Canadian, British and Australian.

Salagatle!