So, this is my Blog, my thoughts / feelings / ideas. You may comment if you like. If you attack me, I come back at you with reckless / racist / suicidal abandon. If you compliment me, I thank you. If you don't ever visit again I don't care. Other than that, just enjoy what I write, or not.

LIU - Look It Up!


Thursday, February 17, 2011

So, time to post some humour.....


The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman.
And she was somewhat upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'
And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love so at least I can tell you what happened.' 'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'
And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.
I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days.
So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.
Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away.
Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight.
I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.
I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the same.'
The husband took a quick breath and continued - 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, 'Please ... Do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?'

This one I might have posted some time ago.....
Please warn ALL your Male Friends . This can turn out very Ugly. !!!

A warning for all men who may be regular Builders Warehouse customers. Over The last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply Going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be Naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends.

Here's how the scam works:

Two very hot girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping Into the boot. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and WindoLene with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It Is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they Say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to KFC. You agree and they get in The back seat. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them climbs
Over into the front seat and starts crawling all over you, unzips your pants And plays with you while the other one steals your wallet.

I had my wallet stolen October 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th & 29th. Also November 1st, 4th, twice on the 8th, three times Last Saturday and very likely again this upcoming weekend. So please be careful.

P.S. Mr Price has wallets on sale @ R1.99 each


Mohammed entered his classroom on the first day of school.

"What's your name?" asked the teacher.
"Mohammed," he replied.
"You're in America now," replied the teacher, "So from now on you will be known as Kevin."
Mohammed returned home after school.
"How was your day, Mohammed?" his mother asked.
"My name is not Mohammed. I'm in America and now my name is Kevin."
"Are you ashamed of your name? Are you trying to dishonor your parents, your heritage, your religion? Shame on you!" And his mother beat him.
Then she called his father, who beat him again.
The next day Mohammed returned to school. The teacher saw all of his bruises.
"What happened to you, Kevin?² she asked.
Well ma'am, shortly after becoming an American, I was attacked by two fuckin' Arabs.

Not too sure what this is about - but interesting anyway!
The Afrikaans title is "Leeuloop v Slak Sleep" - Lion Walk v Snail trail..........



Divemaster Dad said...

In the pic, the guy is the idiot who sang the "Leeuw Loop" song, and she is a Bulls cheerleader, both performing at Loftus on the Super14 final 2 years ago (I think it was that long ago)..."interesting" is not a word I would have used to describe it... :-)

Wreckless Euroafrican said...

DMD, if you don't find anything in this pic "interesting" you been in Slaap stad for too long. Seriously!!!