So, this is my Blog, my thoughts / feelings / ideas. You may comment if you like. If you attack me, I come back at you with reckless / racist / suicidal abandon. If you compliment me, I thank you. If you don't ever visit again I don't care. Other than that, just enjoy what I write, or not.

LIU - Look It Up!


Thursday, May 20, 2010

Just my thoughts - and current mood I suppose....

So, no insult to the real "Christians" out there, but isn't it amazing how many of them profess to be Christians, are seen by their peers (in their church and immediate friends groups) as awesome followers / believers / living the Word, but in actual fact they are just so false, off the track, don't even know that Fellowship and love starts at home?
How do they think this will aid them in achieving the promised eternal life? Surely they have read the Book? It's not flexible, does not allow for options. You either believe, and life it, or you don't. No gray area - no if's or but's.
So, whatever you may think, and whatever you want others to think, you are either right or wrong, but cannot be selective to suit your own preferences / requirements. Think about it - and get your stuff right!

So, what's all this about? Well, I'm in another situation, second one now, where I have been "rejected" outright by someone close to me. Seems like you only good enough whilst you are useful to their cause / need, and at some point they then decide they can do without you, and you are rejected. Now this would not usually be a serious problem, we all have friends (ex) who have treated us in this way at some time or other.

But, the first time this situation arose was with my sister. We have always had a bit of a rocky relationship, maybe cause she's the learned one (Varsity degree) and was married to a very very wealthy guy (he died a few years ago). But we always had some form of relationship, especially whilst my dad was alive. After he passed, we kind of got along, I would make an effort to see her, assist wherever i could, especially after her husband passed. Then an indecent happened, of which I had no part, but she put the blame on me, and cut ff the relationship / contact / communication. No matter - but what did / does burn my arse is that she also stopped all communication with my wife (The Princess) and my boys (LuckyL and GMan). So, she has had no involvement in their lives for probably 3 - 4 years. Does not know how well they have done in sport and at school, nothing. Oh, and she broke off her relationship with my brother at the same time, as well as his wife and daughter. still no problem I suppose - many siblings lose contact. What does fuck me over though is that in her environment she's this goody 2 shoes. Everyone she knows outside of the family think she's an angel from heaven. This ultimate Christian, giving of her time to visit the elderly, do church work, etc, etc, etc. However, she treats our Mom like she's a moron, and has no contact with her family. How fucked up is that? The point is - if you want to portray the semblance of being a Christian, and think that you are doing what it takes to get through the pearly gates one day, well you got it all wrong. All those people around you who think you are this super humble Christian do not get you in the big house. On judgment day (and as a Christian you would believe there will be one) all will be revealed - and one of the first questions you will e asked is "So, Why did you treat your siblings like lepers?" "Does charity and love of your neighbors not start at home?"

So, I don't care one way or the other, other than it leaves a bad taste in my mouth as I now treat any "Christian" with kid gloves. Are they truly what they claim to be? I know of one friend who is "All Christian". He's a long time friend, and he wears his Christianity on his sleeve, for all the world to see. He is forgiving, humble, and will always ensure that his slate is clean. MB my friend, you are a true Christian.

Now, for many years my relationship with my brother has been tops. or so I thought. he's been through some troubled times - I've been there for him. I've had some issues, he's been there for me. he was up here visiting a while ago, and we (teh Princess and I) felt he wasn't all happy. But we figured it was stress etc. Can't always be the happy chappy I suppose - and we gave him his space.

Anyway, I got a call from someone about one of the bikes that were for sale. We wanted R40k. he offered R32k. i said no thanks and hung up. I discussed this with my brother, and his come back was "well, times are tough out there, money isn't so readily available." I countered with the fact that I was not in a hurry to sell, and so could wait till I got what I wanted. he kind of pushed the fact that I should let it go for a lower price. My response was that I had a value, and was happy to wait. As an example I said "You have that gold chain you want to sell. Well, you want R8k for it - I tell you what - I'll give you R6k now - cash!" Well, is reaction was incredible. he completely lost it went off his rocker, stormed upstairs, told his wife to pack - and left!!! Yea. Said I was always talking to him like he was a child, and he felt he deserved to be spoken to as an adult. Cool - no sweat man - care to discuss it? he wasn't interested - and left.

Gone. No problem. Except - he's one of the above mentioned Christians. Back home he's very involved with his church. Has prayer meets at his home. Goes on church outings, etc etc etc. And today I got an email from him confirming he wants absolutely nothing to do with me anymore!

Well good for you boet. You know what - those pearly gates are probably going to be as hard to pass through for you as it will be for your sister - or for me for that matter. Only difference is that - at the moment, I know I'm in trouble there. You think you get a gold pass!!!

Go figure - I am who I am - no airs and graces. Who I am at home is who I am at work, and at play. Nothing changes other than my clothes, and maybe my moods will effect the persona - ON THE DAY!

So, that's why I posted the introductory piece, and why I bothered to explain it. I needed to get this off my chest. After all, that's what this blog is for.

So, it may not be fair to paint every Christian with the same brush, but then life's not fair anyway. Unless you are like MB refered to above, in my books you are a fake! Live with it.



A 2 Z said...

Well, this explains it. I read the same post on FB and knew there had to be something behind it. If its any consolation I'm experiencing the same distress with my own family. Sometimes I blame myself and sometimes I blame them. I understand your point of view on being mystified by people acting a certain way with certain people and completely different with their family. In psychology these people are called dysfunctional. When I was really sad I was told I could only change myself and my reaction to it and not them. So I went into some form of mourning and moved on. Just like you I have my own family and kids and that's were I put my focus and of course some days I mourn for my family. Its normal. What has helped is that I have forgiven them and I even pray for them. It really helps.

Divemaster Dad said...

Dang...I always thought you two were really close. Sorry to hear about it, bro...