GATIEP - for my non South African readers

I have translated those that can be translated - and still make sense....


In the Court
Judge: How can you plead not guilty when there are 5 people who saw your stealing?
Gatiep: "Your Honor, I can bring thousands who will testify not having seen me steel anything!

Gatieps voice mail
My brother, Gatiep is not available.
Leave your name and number and I'll send you a "please call me"

Gatiep at school
teacher asks Gatiep: "Your mother has 4 potatoes, you are 9 children, how many potatoes can each child get?
Gatiep: "My mom's not stupid, she makes mash!"

The rope
Gatiep drags a rope down the street, and walks past Marai. She asks, "Gatiep why are you dragging that piece of rope?" He replies, "Have you ever tried to push a piece of rope?"

The one and only
Gammat is charged with calling Meraai a BITCH.
During cross questioning, he says, "You were standing up there on the balcony, and I was down in the street?"
"Yes," says Meraai.
"There were quite a few people on that balcony with you?" says Gammat.
"Yes," says Meraai.
"Now what gives you the idea I was talking to you?"
"Cause I was the only BITCH there" says Meraai.

Same ol' same ol'.
The judge looks Gammat in the eye and says:
'It's nou the 6th year in siccession that you appear in the dock in my court,
''Your Honor,' says Gammat, 'Don't blame me if you not getting promoted!'

Salagatle!