Some to and froing of emails

between me and my brother (he who is looking after Mom)

From him:-
Hi
You need to take leave as I have the following jobs:
Build carport
Fix 3rd bike
Fix sprayer pipe
Install lights in back yard
Replace lights in front yard
Fill flower beds with sand
Cover lawn with top soil
Install shelves in bedroom
Repack garage
ETC………..
P.S I need the break, please come down tomorrow.

My response:-
Due to the amount of work that seems to be outstanding at our selected
timeshare of choice, I thing vacations for this year should be cancelled!

From him:-

Hi
Sorry for the confusion the following e-mail should have been sent
Dear Guest
Your weeks time share is ready and planned for you
Day 1 Rest from drive and visit to see developments
Day 2 Discover the past (4x4 drives to old beach fishing spots)
Day 3 Rest
Day 4 Fishing trip
Day 5 Trip to snorkeling site
Day 6 Trip to Durban
Day 7 Rest
Day 8 We rest as you have "Fucked Off"
Day 9 Start the work listed below

My response:-

Seeing as the itinerary has been prepared and as presented below, serious consideration will be taken in this regard.
However, I'm not sure that we want to stay at a place that:-
Build carport - does not have proper cover for our vehicle
Fix 3rd bike - has faulty recreational facilities
Fix sprayer pipe - has dry gardens due to faulty equipment
Install lights in back yard - is dark, and therefore dangerous
Replace lights in front yard - see response above
Fill flower beds with sand - needs sand in it's beds......
Cover lawn with top soil - has no cover on it's lawns
Install shelves in bedroom - no shelving in the bedrooms - where are we supposed to put our stuff?
Repack garage - and has a garage which is used as a store room.

We may decide to decline, however, should there be further motivation in this regard, we will consider it.

Salagatle!