Kids, dogs, and petrol

A little girl asked her Mum, 'Mum, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?'
Mum replies, 'No, because she is on heat.'
What does that mean?' asked the child.
'Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage.'
The little girl goes to the garage and says, 'Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mum, but she said the dog was on heat and to come to you.'

Dad said, 'Bring Belle over here.'
He took a rag, soaked it with petrol, and scrubbed the dog's backside with it to disguise the scent and said 'OK, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time round the block.'

The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash.
Surprised, Dad asked, 'Where's Belle?' The little girl said, 'She ran out of petrol about halfway down the block so another dog is pushing her home.'














Salagatle!

Little old April's fool!

Defense Attorney:
Will you please state your age?

Little Old Lady:
I am 86 years old.

Defense Attorney:
Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened the night of April 1st?

Little Old Lady:
There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch on a warm spring evening,
when a young man comes creeping up on the porch and sat down beside me.

Defense Attorney:
Did you know him?

Little Old Lady:
No, but he sure was friendly.

Defense Attorney:
What happened after he sat down?

Little Old Lady:
He started to rub my thigh.

Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him?

Little Old Lady:
No, I didn't stop him.

Defense Attorney:
Why not?

Little Old Lady:
It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago.

Defense Attorney:
What happened next?

Little Old Lady:
He began to rub my breasts.

Defense Attorney:
Did you stop him then?

Little Old Lady:
No, I did not stop him.

Defense Attorney:
Why not?

Little Old Lady:
His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't felt that good in years!

Defense Attorney:
What happened next?

Little Old Lady:
Well, by then, I was feeling so "spicy" that I just laid down and told him
"Take me, young man. Take me now!"

Defense Attorney:
Did he take you?

Little Old Lady:
Hell, no! He just yelled, "April Fool!" And that's when I shot him, the little bastard.















Salagatle!

Some pics from my cell phone

Some pics from my camera.













This really pisses me off! a) It's illegal to post on the STOP sign. b) You would think the local traffic department could take down the cell number on the poster, call / trace the perpetrator, and fine them!














At Sun City, as it was feeding time for these little monkeys, we were allowed inside the cage. They are soft, friendly, tame, and immediately tried to steal my smokes, handkerchief, and wallet!!! Wonder where they learned that from?



















A Giant Spotted Eagle Owl. Also at Sun City, it's a rehabilitated bird, probably found injured, and now kept as a teaching aid. We have one that sits on the roof of our house every now and then. It's close on 400 mm tall!














The Palace at Sun City! beautiful - pic taken from one of the golf holes.














The Cascades Hotel - Sun City.














Sun rise on my way to work one morning!














Sun Set from the deck of my home - one evening!














A seriously big Cycad!














An African Theme restaurant at Mandela Square - Sandton City. We went there for dinner one night with a bunch of international consultants. They really enjoyed the food and entertainment.




















Meerlust Rubicon - Magnum (1.5lt) at R1200.00 per bottle - we had 2! Worth every cent!

Salagatle!